A handful of Twitter inspired jokes:
I used to like to think of something really stupid to say and then not say it; then along came Twitter.
Watch what you eat AND watch what you say; as with food, you are what you tweet.
I’ve been thinking about Tweeting to someone in jail, but the sentence was too long.
Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to retweet it.
After ‘M’onday and ‘T’uesday all you’re left with is ‘WTF’.
LMAO… damn, now where am I going to sit?
Some tweeters have a way with words, others don’t not have none.
‘Doctor, Doctor, I think I’m addicted to Twitter’ ~ ‘Sorry, I don’t follow you’
Twitter’s great; I neither put on weight nor feel uncomfortable when I’ve had too much Tweet.
I wanted to follow UK politicians Nick Clegg and Vince Cable on Twitter, but I can’t ad-lib.
I was going to tweet about anticlimaxes, but then I didn’t.
My canary has stopped chirping. Please retweet.
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